Part 3: Summer
Summer is one of the only people who stand up for Auggie. Do you think being a bystander to bullying is just as harmful as bullying?
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I think being a bystander isn’t as bad as bullying but it is still pretty bad, because you are not physically or mentally bullying the person or people but you are witnessing what is happening and not doing anything about it. I understand that sometimes people don’t know what to say but you could at least stand by that person to show you care. Some people are more quiet upstairs than others like instead of talking to the bully they just send them a text later to ask if they are of or they touch their shoulder with sympathy. Being a bystander and being a silent upstander are two separate things. Being a bystander is doing nothing, and being a silent upstander is showing that you care. I realize that some people are afraid to stand up to bullies, but people have to get over that feat because you would want them to do that for you. In conclusion, bullying and bystanding are different things but are still similar, so people have to get over the fear of talking to bullies and stand up for each other.
ReplyDeleteI like how you say being a bystander and being a silent up stander are two separate things.
DeleteI liked how you acknowledged the fact that a silent up stander is still an up stander
DeleteI like how you say you understand that you might not know what to say
DeleteI like how you said people need to get over their fear of talking to bullies and stand up for the victim.
DeleteI like the fact that you said people need to get over their fears and help other people. I also like that you said sending a text or asking if their okay doesn't help because it really doesn't. Obviously they aren't okay.
DeleteI like how you mentioned people being afraid of bullies, and needing to face their fear and stand up for themselves, and other people as well.
DeleteI think that most people are not upstanders because they are scared to be one so I like how you said that people should get over their fear of talking to bullies and stand up for each other.
DeleteI don't think being a bystander is as bad as being a bully, but I still think it is bad. Being a bystander is watching someone being bullied and not standing up for them. Standing up for someone takes a lot of courage. If you see someone being bullied most likely you won't stand up for them. Being a bystander is terrible. It's not good to watch bullying take place without standing up for the victim, but bullying someone is much worse. If you are intending to hurt someone that is worse than being a bystander. Being a bully is a whole other level. Bullying is much worse than being a bystander but being a bystander is terrible too.
ReplyDeleteMight there be certain situations where you might be a bystander for your own safety?
DeleteI disagree. I would say that it is not the bystander's fault for being their, so they shouldn't be holding any responsibility for the incident. Yes, I think it is better for a bystander to stand up to the bully, but I wouldn't be harsh to the bystanders because they were just in the wrong place at the wrong time. If you didn't use such strong words in your blog (like terrible), then I would probably reconsider this comment.
DeleteI like how you say you understand that you might not know what to say
DeleteI like how you said "It's not good to watch bullying take place without standing up for the victim, but bullying someone is much worse." I agree since it is not good to watch someone suffer, and not take action on the situation.
DeleteI like how you said it took courage to stand up for someone.
DeleteI think that it matters on the situation. Laughing at the victim on the sidelines is one thing, staying back away from the fight because you are concerned about your well being is another thing. Not caring about the bulling is bad laughing at the victim is worse and being the bully is terrible. But if you are staying back away from the fight because you are concerned about your well being that is fine but you should at least make some attempt to tell a teacher or a trusted adult.
ReplyDeleteI like how you mentioned that you should care for yourself as well as the person getting bullied.
DeleteI like you said that sometimes bystanders want to care for their health. Some people just run into confronting a bully without analyzing if the bully taller or stronger than them, so I'm glad that you mentioned that in your message.
DeleteI like how you said not caring for the bully is bad laughing at the victim is worse and being the bully is terrible.
DeleteI agree how you said it totally depends on the situation and how making some attempt like telling a teacher is the least you should do.
DeleteI like how you mentioned not trying to get hurt when confronting a bully.
DeleteI like how you mentioned not to get hurt when telling on a bully.
DeleteI think being a bystander is not as harmful as bullying. I do not think it is bad at all. Yes, I do think if I was a bystander I would try to stand up to the bully, but (like the woman said in the video), it is easier said than done. I think being a bystander is not bad because some people could be scared, and they might not want to stand up to the bully because the bully might bully the up stander too. Of course, the up stander wouldn’t want to be bullied. If the bystander was scared of facing the bully, the bystander could help the person getting bullied in another way like consoling them or talking to them (also mentioned in the video). All in all, I think that people should try their best to stand up to bullying, but they should understand the risk of it too.
ReplyDeleteI like how you said that the up stander could get bullied by the bully as well, which can happen sometimes. It's important that they know what to do before going to try to solve the situation.
DeleteI like you refer back to the video in your blog
DeleteI like how you said that you would be a up stander. This would end the bullying from the current situation.
DeleteI like how you said that people should try to stand up to bullying, but should understand the risk of it too.
DeleteI like you refer back to the video in your blog
DeleteI like how you said people should try their best to be an up-stander but should understand the risk. Bullies are very unpredictable.
DeleteI disagree how you said that people should understand the risk of being an up stander and how if you do you have chance of being bullied. I disagree because if you can tell the bully to stop and support the other person they are most probable going to leave you alone.
DeleteI agree with you, people might be scared to stand up to the bully in fear of themselves getting bullied.
DeleteI like how you put your body in the up-stander's shoes and talked about how they might be afraid to take action.
DeleteI disagreed when you said that there is a risk of being an upstander because if you stand up for the person being bullied that the bully would probally leave the victim alone.
DeleteI agree that upstanders should understand that risk of upstanding.
DeleteI agree that it is easier said than done because alot of times we say I am a upstander but in reality we are just bystanders.
DeleteI don't think being a bystander is the most terrible thing in the world, but it's still extremely unacceptable to just watch someone getting bullied and doing nothing in response. Even though it takes a lot of courage to stand up to bullies, the victim would feel much better with at least someone on his/her side. Even a small, empathically helpful message could make someone's day turn brighter after encountering a bully. Some people don't have the courage to stand up to someone that's probably a lot stronger than they are, and that's perfectly fine because it's not easy to. However, just standing there, watching someone get bullied will probably almost never help. People should at least get an adult to solve the situation. Concluding all of this, being a bystander isn't that terrible, but it's still not right to just watch the bullying happen.
ReplyDeleteI like that you say to have empathy to the person being bullied.
DeleteI like the fact that you said although it isn't terrible, being a bystander is still not right and I absolutely agree with you on that.
DeleteI like how you would give them a helpful or encouraging message.
DeleteI like how you said that being an bystander is not good because you are not helping the situation improve.
DeleteI like how you said that even if you are afraid to confront the bully face to face, you can still tell a teacher or help the victim in other ways.
DeleteIf you are a bystander you are helping the bully making you a bully.You’re helping the bully by letting him or her get away with it. Some bystanders think that it is not their business and they might get beat up but they are just as much a bully as the other person bullying the kid. The kid that is bullying the kid might stop if you tell a teacher and he gets in trouble. If you don’t the kid bullying would get away with it and the kid bullied think you don’t like them. So don’t be a bystander.
ReplyDeleteI like that you said not to be a bystander. This supports your details, and concludes your paragraph.
DeleteI like how you said by being a bystander you are helping the bully making you a bully.
DeleteI think that being a bystander when someone is being bullied is not as bad as being a bully, but it is still to somewhat extent bad. Being a bystander is not good because that means that you are not helping the situation improve. This means that the victim will keep getting bullied until someone takes action. Don't be a bystander because it is not useful. Be an up stander because this is always useful. Up standers typically stand up for the person who is the victim of being bullying. Don't be a bystander, be an up stander
ReplyDeleteI like how you said that the victim will keep getting bullied if no one takes action and how you said that being a bystander isn't useful. I also like how you ended your message with an imperative sentence. It brings more "mmph" to your conclusion.
DeleteI like how you said that being an bystander is not good because you are not helping the situation improve.
DeleteI like how you said that being a bystander is bad because you are not helping the situation improve. I also agree with Derek because I like the way you closed your blog and it really brings the message together.
DeleteI like how you said that a bystander is useless, but an up stander is not. I agree that being an up stander is to some extent bad.
DeleteI think that being a bystander will not necessarily be bulling, but either standing up for them, which will take a lot of courage, or just tell an adult. Because the adult will deal with the situation, and you might just get hurt by the bully. And just standing there watching wouldn't help with anything at all, and by telling an adult, you would have helped out without being part of the situation. And you would be an up-stander even without confronting the bully.
ReplyDeleteI agree when you said it will take a lot of courage, and when you said just standing there couldn't help at all. <3
DeleteI disagree with what you said about helping out without being apart of the situation. If you help by telling someone else then you are still appart of it.
DeleteI think being a bystander is not as harmful as being the bully. If someone is a bystander and they start to help the bully then they are just as bad as the bully, but if you just watch them being bullied and do nothing about the situation you are almost just as bad as the bully. If you are a bystander and see someone being bullied then you should try to stand up to the bully in any way you can. For example, you can tell a teacher or tell an adult or just confront the bully when you see them bullying anyone. When you stand up to a bully it makes them feel less powerful and might even stop that person from bullying anyone else. Overall, when you see someone being bullied you should do something about it even if it is something small.
ReplyDeleteI agree with you about what do in this situation.
DeleteI like how you said why that it helps to confront the bully.
DeleteI do not agree with your thinking of the bystander is not as harmful as bullying, but I do agree with the fact that you said if you start to bully you are just as guilty.
DeleteCaitliin...What do you think he should do?????
DeleteIn my opinion, being a bystander isn't the absolute worst thing in the world because there are some situations where you really don't need nor want to get involved. However, if you should see someone being bullied, you should probably do something about though. It takes guts to stand up to a bully and most people would be to afraid to place themselves in that position. You could always go to a teacher, but what if the bully happened to be someone like Julian, a teacher's pet in front of the adults and a bully in front of other kids, and just denied that ever happening? You then would probably have to have evidence. I think the easiest thing to do is to just put a halt to the fight right then and there, and if he threatens you, just ignore it and tell him to quit picking on other people just because his own insecure little mind can't handle his own life situations. Besides, if that bully doesn't learn his lesson, down the road he will eventually pick on the wrong person and end up with broken bones. I've always been told that if someone tries to fight you physically, don't be afraid to defend yourself. If a bully were ever to be violent when I or anyone else was trying to stand up for someone, use self-defense. Standing up for yourself and others who are being bullied is very important. If kids don't learn how to be an up-stander for themselves, then the bullying will just become worse as they get older. That's why my rule of thumb is if someone is too afraid to stand up for themselves, help them out a little bit. Being a by-stander is still bad, just not quite as bad as bullying because if you wanted to, you could've stopped the bully but chose not to.
ReplyDeleteI love all your information and great details to make your response more interesting.
DeleteI like how you mentioned ending the situation right then and there. I also liked that fact that you said that if people cannot stand up for themselves, then bullying will worsen for them as they get older.
DeleteI agree how you said that the bullies need to learn their lesson and you need to learn how to be an up stander or else things will get worse down the road.
DeleteI agree when you said sometimes you don't want to get involved with the situation but you should help because when you can help and do the right thing without making the situation worse, you should.
DeleteI think that being a bystander isn't terrible but it is still bad because if someone was being bullied and you did not stand up then you would be just as guilty. Even if you are not bullying someone but you witnessed it, it is still the same. Just watching and not doing anything about it is even worse. Some people just do not have the courage to stand up to a bully. As a bystander, you should be the up stander. The right thing to do is stand up to the bully even if you are standing alone. I would rather make someone else feel good then to say nothing and let that person be hurt by what someone said or did.
ReplyDeleteI don't agree with what you said about being just as guilty. You did not do anything at all to hurt the person's feelings. You where just in the wrong place at the wrong time. Though it is important to be an up-stander.
DeleteI agree with Ryan except for, if you bystand it is a little bad but not as much as being the bully
DeleteI have to agree with Ryan. I don't think you are just as guilty as bullying the person.
DeleteI disagree, I think that bullying is worse than being a bystander because you did not say anything mean to them. You just didn't say anything about the situation.
DeleteI agree with Caitlin, I think you are just as guilty and you are right about some people not having the courage to stand up to a bully. If you don't have the courage, then tell a teacher.
DeleteI think that being a bystander when someone is being bullied is not as bad as being a bully, but it is still to somewhat extent bad. Being a bystander is not good because that means that you are not helping the situation improve. This means that the victim will keep getting bullied until someone takes action. Don't be a bystander because it is not useful. Be an up stander because this is always useful. Up standers typically stand up for the person who is the victim of being bullying. Don't be a bystander, be an up
ReplyDeletestander
In my opinion, I think that being a bystander is not as harmful as bullying. This is my opinion since when you bully someone, you actually hurt that person's feelings, but when you are being a bystander, you don't actually do anything to hurt that person. It would still be better to report something like that happening to an adult, or to stand up to the bully yourself. For example, when Julian was bullying August nobody stood up for him. Being a bystander means that you do not have the confidence to stand up to a bully. Summer did have that confidence. It takes a lot of courage to stand up to a bully, but it is better to take action then to let the situation remain as it is. Find the confidence in yourself, and be an up stander.
ReplyDeleteI agree if you are a bystander it isn't as harmful to the persons feelings as if you were actually bullying them.
DeleteI agree. Just because they were there and didn't say anything to the person doesn't really make them be as bad as a bully, because a bully says mean things to them and they still don't say anything of course.
DeleteI agree when you talked about finding the courage in you, because upstanding can be hard. I also liked when you referenced the book, since that is what the blog is about.
DeleteI think being a bystander isn't as bad as bullying, but is still kind of bad. I think this is right because you don't actually do anything bad to hurt the person's feelings, but you don't do anything to stand up for them or help them. I also think that it is still slightly bad because you don't do anything that can possibly make a huge difference. It isn't hard to tell the person to stop or go and tell an adult. Those little things can make a huge difference and it is much better than just standing there and do nothing. Saying something as simple as stop can help greatly and if we all said or did something small like that bullying wouldn't be a problem these days.
ReplyDeleteI have to agree. A bully is worse because they say mean things to the person and they don't admit they did it. A bystander just doesn't say anything.
DeleteI agree when you say you don't do anything to help stand up for them because all bystanders could have been upstanders.
DeleteI do not feel that if you are a bystander, you are as bad or worse as a bully. You are just there at the wrong place at the wrong time. I feel that is important that a bystander tells someone, but it is harder than you think. If you have ever witnessed someone being bullied, you would understand that it is very tough to tell a trusted adult. Even worse, if your friend is being a bully to someone, it is even harder to tell a teacher or trusted adult for you don't want to ruin your friendship with that person.
ReplyDeleteI liked how you said that they are just in the wrong place at the wrong time and I also like how you said how hard it is to tell an adult about a bully.
DeleteI like how you mentioned hurting your friendships or relations with the bully. That is an interesting topic.
DeleteI like how you included the part about witnessing bulling.
DeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
DeleteI disagree. Imagine if a kid is being bullied, and you walk by without doing anything. Then, the next day, you hear that the bully/bullies broke his nose, and he had to go to the hospital. You could have stopped it, if you'd chosen to be an upstander, but instead, you left things as they were, and something horrible happened.
DeleteBullying is a terrible thing, and if out of the 100% of people bystanding only 20% are upstanding we have a problem. Being a bystander isn't as bad as bullying but it is still something you should try not to do. In the video Emily said that in 9 out of 10 cases bullying takes place in front of an audience and kids stop bullies 50% of the time, which is good. She also said that kids would like to help but they do not know how, then she said it is sometimes better to stand by the person getting mocked than stand up to the person bullying.
ReplyDeleteI personally think that being a bystander isn't as bad as being a bully. I think this because a bystander is there when somebody is getting bullied but, they don't do anything to stop it or say anything mean to them. This is still bad and they should still feel guilty for not telling anybody about what had happened. Still, they didn't say anything mean to the person being bullied. At least they didn't make anybody feel bad. Therefore, being a bully is worse than being a bystander in a way.
ReplyDeleteI like that you said that being a bystander is not right when you could tell someone.
DeleteI think being a bystander when there is bullying taking place is not as harmful as being the bully itself, but it is still not the best thing to do in a situation like that. I understand that sometimes when you are in that place and time you don't know what to do but after that thing happens people think of what they could have done. If that happens then you could be a silent bystander and text or talk to the bully later and be an upstander in your own time. Being a bystander is not necessarily bad because you did not want to be in that situation at that time it just happened to be a coincidence. It can also be hard to stand up to a bully when that bully may be your friend but think about it this way, if you let the bully keep bullying one person then they may think it is ok and continue to do it to other people and one of the other people may end up being you.
ReplyDeleteI think being a bystander when there is bullying taking place is not as harmful as being the bully itself, but it is still not the best thing to do in a situation like that. I understand that sometimes when you are in that place and time you don't know what to do but after that thing happens people think of what they could have done. If that happens then you could be a silent bystander and text or talk to the bully later and be an upstander in your own time. Being a bystander is not necessarily bad because you did not want to be in that situation at that time it just happened to be a coincidence. It can also be hard to stand up to a bully when that bully may be your friend but think about it this way, if you let the bully keep bullying one person then they may think it is ok and continue to do it to other people and one of the other people may end up being you.
ReplyDeleteI like it when you said (at the end) the "victim" might end up being you.
DeleteI especially like the part when you talked about speaking to the bully later, and I agree on the section when you spoke about being confused and scared in these situation. I loved your comment. :)
DeleteI like how you said you could talk to the bully on your own time, that way it would give you time to decide what to say, how to say it, and gather enough courage to speak to a bully.
DeleteI think that being a bystander you are just as guilty as the bully. Lets say you were walking in the halls, and all of a sudden you hear a group of kids talking and saying some pretty mean stuff about another kid. You think "Well I don't want to be involved in that" or something like that. You walk away. Not standing up for the bully's victim makes you just as guilty. You might as well be the bully or join in on the game. I know it can be hard to stand up for someone in that situation, and I think everybody can say that. If you stand up for someone in a serious situation, you will receive something in return. Gratitude. You may even stop the bully from being so mean to others. Never back down in a situation you think you could do something about...
ReplyDeleteI think being a bystander to bullying is just as guilty as bullying. If you are a bystander to bullying, and you don't do anything about it, then you are just as guilty knowing you could have done something. In addition, you will have a conscience. I think you are even more guilty if no one else but you, the bully, and the victim are around. You don't even have to stand up to the bully if you don't fell confident enough, and that is okay. Instead, you could find a trusted adult to tackle the situation. You can make the victim fell better by befriending them, and being with them, so the bully will not come near you again. Do not just stand on the sidelines. Bullying is wrong and you should stop it.
ReplyDeleteOne might be tempted to think that if you are a bystander in a bullying situation it is not as bad as actually being the bully because the bystander doesn't get involved with the bullying itself. If you are a bully you are culpable and actually create the issue. The bystander is not completely free from blame either because sometimes you are just as guilty when you watch without protesting rather than being the culprit. They are both fairly bad because a bully hurts people's feelings and an bystander watches as another person gets bullied and does absolutely nothing about it. If I were witnessing someone being bullied I would immediately walk away and tell an authority about it because it might be hard to confront one of my fellow students. Being an bystander is not a very moral thing to do.
ReplyDeleteI agree on the ending part, being a bystander is not the morally correct thing to do, and I would feel guilty if I was one.
DeleteI like how you said that you would get help from an authority if someone was being bullied.
DeleteNo, I don't think being a bystander is as harmful as being a bully. The reasons I support my opinion are, you are not directly interacting with the person so you have a "zero" effect. However, if you were to be a bully you would have a negative effect and would directly hurt the person. However, in certain cases being a bystander can be just as bad, for example if you were to laugh at the person being bullied, form a crowd, engage in jeering, etc. Overall I do not think being a bystander is the best thing you could do to help this situation bullying is serious and is not something to joke about, and if I see a bully I will directly step in and call an authority to help ease up the situation.
ReplyDeleteBeing a bystander to bullying is not as harmful as bullying. Even though it may not be as bad as bullying, being a bystander is still not the best. Being a bystander means you stand there while someone is being bullied. The right thing, but very hard and takes courage to do, is to stand up to the bullies. During the moment when someone is being bullied, the bystander should have empathy. The bystander should realize what if I was being bullied. Also, doing nothing in some cases is very bad, especially if you could've helped. All bystanders understand they could have done something to make a change but that something never occurred. Bullying is hurting someone emotionally or physically. Being a bystander is not as bad because you may only hurt them emotionally. Being bullied and seeing someone standing around just letting it happen hurts you inside because you think and realize am I not important enough to them for them to stop the bully from hurting me emotionally. Being a bystander may not be bad, but it doesn’t hurt to be an upstander.
ReplyDeleteJansen
DeleteI agree with you when you said that it takes courage to be an upstander.
I like how you included the importance of empathy and knowing how others feel when they're in times of need.
DeleteI think that if you are an up stander it is not at all because your not being mean to the bully, but rather standing up for the victim. For example if a bully is hurting someone's feelings than instead of trying to hurt the bullies feelings, but rather telling them to stop hurting the victim's feelings. So in conclusion, bullying is way worse than being an up stander.
ReplyDeleteJansen
ReplyDeleteNo, I do not think being a bystander is just as bad as being a bully to someones face. Being an upstander is much better than being a bystander because you are helping the person that is being bullied. Bullying is just awful and no one should be bullied or bully and everyone should be an upstander. bullies hurt other people feelings and upstander try to stop them. Bullying is not good at all and it should be stop but bulyying is far worse than being an bystander.
Bullying is horrible. Anyone witnessing it should immediately go to an authority figure, and if you don’t you’re just as guilty as the person who actually bullied someone. Seeing someone being bullied and doing nothing does not help the situation whatsoever. In Wonder, Jack may not have directly hurt August when he did nothing to stop things like “the plague,” but he definitely didn’t help the situation. Say, for example, a younger kid was being abused by some of the older kids at a park. If you left them alone, you wouldn’t be directly hurting the boy/girl, but it would still be horrible for the poor person being bullied. If you did choose to help them, they’d be grateful, and would probably be an upstander if you were being bullied. Whereas, if he/she saw you walk away from them in their time of need, they might do the same, or even worse, join in with the bullies. Also, being an upstander is a part of choosing kindness, and it’s everyone’s duty to be kind, no matter the cost. So, in the end, being the bystander doesn’t seem as bad as being a bully when you’re just glossing over the surface, but if you look closer, you’ll see that, yes, it is just as bad as hurting the victim directly, and it can be, in some ways. If I was being physically, or even mentally abused, and I saw someone just walk away and do nothing, it would make me feel twice as bad about myself, because it would seem that no one would care enough to do something about it.
ReplyDelete